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May 14, 2009

I must say, I’ve been dreading home since the verge of Spring semester. December break was just so long. I could literally see time crawl. And the summer so far hasn’t exactly been a blast, but right now I realize what I always miss about here and now that I can never get outside of, well, here and now.

I don’t feel unbridled happiness or freedom, but potential, and I’m taking this potential to be lazy, and I’m OK with that because there’s a reason every human being indulges in lethargy once in a while. 

As I sit here in my mother’s kaftan, Smarties wrappers and Trop50 bottles surrounding me and Simon and G-funk spinning on the record player, I realize why I secretly like home. It’s safe in a way safety cannot be described. And it’s more than this house–it’s sitting in Starbucks like I did with half my time senior year. It’s finding yourself driving around aimlessly when you don’t have to, even when your iPod isn’t working and music can’t help fuel the car ride.

And amist this timelessness, everything is moving. I’m always running into people I used to know, people I recognize from Zumba class who probably have no clue about me, people who came to my Halloween party Junior year, new baristas than the ones I remember.



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